the wrong side of the bed

Saturday, September 24, 2005

i hear from constance

... that it is boring to post (in a sing-song voice) "i'm sorry that i have not blogged in so long. i've been sooooo busy kissing everyone's arses offffff the blogoshpere, knowing you are all desperately waiting for my next post." that said, sorry i have not blogged in sooo very long (okay, wait, i think i blooooooogggged not so very long ago (constance says,

constance here. i would just like to say the following: Please use block parentheses if you use parentheses within parentheses.

i don't know quite why she is complaining...

Dorotha has gone to pee. My bladder is not asking for any attention. Thus I am left to entertain you. I say... visit my blog here

constance uses weirder html tags than i do. i hope this all works out.

anyway, i blogged titles last week. fucking deal with that, constance. i know you don't like it.

constance and i are drunk.* we are here together. she wants me to write a joint blogpost with her. i don't feel like it right now. i am speaking aloud as i type in a scottish accent. i don't know why. oh, it is because of Shrek. connie is laughing at me. fuck her. like i would ann arbor (please see forthcoming post from constance). anyway, she is laughing at me. i don't care.

* don't worry. i know that there is at least one person out there who cares enough about me to worry that i am on a booze cruise. i am not. constance and i are engaging in a rare indulgence. we got a bit tipsy whilst watching Shrek. this is not all that common. and, in any case, i seem to be quite capable of going for weeks and weeks without drinking. as far as other dangers might go, constance lives about a block (no lie) away.
10:19 PM

4 Comments:

That is hilarious. Just an update: Dorotha is hung over today. I feel great!
Blogger Constance, at 9:41 AM  
not a booze cruise... a "foo's cruise".

foo as in fool. and where i come from, that's a compliment.
Blogger Henry, at 11:44 AM  
your Scottish accent is better in print than it is in person-- which actually just sounds like you talking regularly, but with someone stretching and pulling on your cheeks.

Oh, and you say "arse" instead of "ass".
Blogger the goat, at 2:59 PM  
More evidence of their drunkenness:

http://gwennieutah.blogspot.com/2005/09/man-pyre.html

And I concur with Jeff: The accent sounded less Scottish than like Dorotha was undergoing cosmetic surgery on her face while speaking.
Blogger Gwen, at 9:42 AM  

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