the wrong side of the bed

Sunday, July 31, 2005

out of my mind

isn't it weird how, when one is all spazzed out about something, everything else becomes a big spazzfest, too? so, i'm taking a prelim, why don't i also start picking at my face to the point where i have scabs and red spots on 1/3 of my face? hey, why don't i also freak out my friends by being really demanding of their affection?

i don't know. i'm doing better than i did last time i took (and failed) a prelim. still, i think i will wear gloves today. or, as liz once offered, i could put socks on my hands to prevent myself from picking, picking, picking.
9:25 AM | link | (2) comments

Saturday, July 30, 2005

back in five minutes

prelim on tuesday. pressed for time. would love to blog, but have taken over responsibilites for posting on jon's blog. not that i'm doing a good job with that, either.

anyway, yeah.
11:03 AM | link | (0) comments

Thursday, July 28, 2005

not whether you win or lose

thanks to sean for recommending procrastination to me. no, no, not as a strategy for getting through the prelim! it is a book. i just wish i had read it at the beginning of the summer. i'm not very far in yet, but it has lead me to realize that failing the social psych prelim does not mean that i do not like what i am doing. even if i fail this prelim, it doesn't mean that i don't like what i am doing. it just means that i don't want to take the fucking prelims. i was sort of looking at my performance as a subconscious reflection on my desire to continue as a sociologist. now, i know as much as the next person that prelims don't assess intelligence, even though it feels like they do, but, come on, dorotha! how on earth would the prelim be tapping into the dark corners of my psyche?!?!?

poor jon keeps trying to encourage me to study because i "want do do well" and i "like to learn" - his words, not mine, i assure you.
12:22 PM | link | (0) comments

we don't have to take our clothes off... oh, wait, we totally do

anyway, i think this is the hottest thing i have seen all year. seriously. i can't stop looking at it. i believe it is called "lucky green dress."
8:47 AM | link | (0) comments

in love

i really, really love carson ellis. i know nothing about this person, not even his/her gender (i suspect female), but i am enchanted by the artwork. i am about to steal from her/his website for my profile image, and i would like to apologize to carson for this. i just can't seem to help myself.
8:36 AM | link | (4) comments

Wednesday, July 27, 2005

what to do, what to do?

i don't know whether to let ang get all "chicken boning shears" on my head or wait until 10:00 to see if the woman who occassionally cuts my hair has any appointments today. all i know is that i want this stuff off of my head. and i want it done 2 days ago. maybe even 3.
8:10 AM | link | (3) comments


that may not have been the best decision i have ever made. could someone with a comb and scissors come over tomorrow and, um, tidy things up a bit?
12:33 AM | link | (1) comments

Tuesday, July 26, 2005

sitting perfectly still

i'm pretty sure that if i am awake in another 30 minutes, it will be because i am cutting my hair off.

i'm pretty sure of this. it isn't 100%
11:26 PM | link | (3) comments

don't get so uptight

my friend joe, apparently with some secret inside knowledge that i was in therapy during the time he sent me this link, has alerted me to the phobia list. interestingly, one of the things i learned last year when i took a course through my health insurance called "attacking anxiety" was that phobias are the result of anxiety. people develop phobias because they are trying to limit situations that may cause anxiety attacks. say you have an anxiety attack while looking at a picture of marx or santa claus. now, the anxiety attack may have nothing to do with capitalism or, um, capitalism, but you may begin avoiding beards to the point that you develop pogonophobia (fear of beards or men with beards). when i was a kid, i had a handful of weird phobias, but like many people, i also had agoraphobia. sometimes i wish i had hung on to that. stupid me for leaving the house.
3:49 PM | link | (2) comments

Friday, July 22, 2005

what will this day be like, i wonder

i'm not sure how i feel yet today. how should i feel? often i wake up happy or sad and i stay that way for the rest of the day. this morning i only felt groggy. i'm highly medicated these days and i was a teensy bit drunk on free beer from the TAA. hopefully i won't be groggy all day. i do wish someone would come over and make me some coffee. i know it is easy, but i am soooo lazy.
10:02 AM | link | (0) comments

Thursday, July 21, 2005

henry can do no wrong

my friend henry is truly amazing. if i had the text of his brother colin's toast from henry's reccent wedding, i would reproduce it here. it was dead-on. he's magical, but does not live in a forest, and is certainly not a tapir.

he wrote this parody of Baby Got Back. it is brilliant. i'll have to make the font orange for this, but i'd make it yellow if i thought you'd be able to read it.

Big Bird Got Beak

Oh my gosh
Becky, follow that bird
It's so big
He looks like one of those... Sesame Street characters
Who understands that Sesame Street?
The kids only watch it because it's filled with total puppets
I mean that bird
It's just so BIG
I can't believe it's so tall
It's just out there
I mean, it's gross
Look, it's just so... yellow.

I like Big Bird and I cannot lie
You other children can't deny
That when a bird hugs you in a warm embrace
with a yellow beak in your face
You have FUN!
You're a Big Bird Buff
Cuz you notice them feathers are fluffed.
Deep in the Down he's wearing
with his googly eyes all staring
Oh, Big Bird I wanna play wit ya
finger-paint your picture.

Mr. Rogers - he really spook me
But that Bird make me say
"C is for Cookie"
Ohh, Mr. Hooper is dead..
But you say you wanna educate my head?
Well teach me, teach me, cuz you played by Carrol Spinney.

I'm a fowl playa.
Even Telly say "Aw ye-ah"
He's yellow... hello!... got it goin like a lemon jello.

I'm tired of Disney and Looney Tunes
Sayin' little ducks are the thing
Take the average kid and ask him that.
Bird gotta lack the "Quack"

So Toddlers (wahhh) Toddlers (wahhh)
Has your backpack got the Bird? (wahhh wahhh)
Well shake it, shake it, shake it, shake it, shake that kid backpack
Big Bird Got Beak
(fellow's really yellow but he's got much beak)

I like 'em winged and big
Maybe even dancin' a jig
He's one of the people in yer 'hood
Only one on the Street
with visible feet

I wanna skip Recess
And turn on the Pee, UH, Bee, UH, Esss
I ain't talkin bout Teletubbies
Those teddy bear freaks were made for babies
I wannem tall, blonde, and goofy
So find that goofy chicken
Don't tell me you sicken
singin' along wit a Chicken
So I'm lookin' at kids videos
Knockin these Rambos fightin' like G.I. Joes
You can have them Rambos
I'll keep my homies like Elmo
A word to the Sesame Street Muppets
I wanna tickle ya
learn lettaz & basic mathematic-a.
But I gotta be straight when I say I wanna .. COUNT.. TO.. THREE
Til the break of dawn
Big Bird got it goin on
Some bullies won't like this song
Cuz them kids don't git it, or admit it
But I'd rather stay and play
Cuz I'll Sing, Sing a Song
And I'm down wit Co-operation

So kiddies (yeah), kiddies (yeah)
Do you wanna sing Raposo ditties? (yeah)
Then jump around
Sing it loud
Even Oscar's got to shout
Big Bird got Beak

Yeah mommy
When it comes to ornithology
Audubon ain't got nothin to do with my selection
your bird adores the number 4?
Only if he's 8'2".

D'ya see that one where he went to China?
It was brought to ya by the number Nine-a.
SnuffleUPagus is Down, he knows there's no one fine-a.
That Bert & Ernie can't LEARN A WORD until they've heard BIG BIRD
You can watch Rugrats or Barney, but please don't dis the 'Street'
Older brothers wanna act all adult
no longer think they're six years old
So they dis it and leave it
But I still young enuff to believe it

So you can say the alphabet?
You should hear Big Bird do that.
Cuz he took all the letters and he made em ONE WORD
Now that's my kinda Bird!
To that Pikachu in the Pokemon:
Y'ain't the only yellow thang
The Count can count me as a devoutly
bird-watchin' foo' though my mutha she ground me
Some nincompoop tried to jest
that Big Bird and I share a Nest
I went and I triple-dog dare 'im
to prove I'm a part of his harem.
So kiddies you wanna take that frown
And turn it right upside down?
Then can ya tell me HOW to get,
how to GET to my favorite muppet?
Big Bird Got Beak
4:51 PM | link | (2) comments

good luck, flynny!

but, what is a kitten heal? i'm imagining you walking on the skulls of little cats, but i'm sure this can't be true.
3:29 PM | link | (8) comments

while i am posting about the alphabet...

ABC-DEF-GHI - sung by Big Bird, but written by Joe Raposo* & Jon Stone

It's the most remarkable word I've ever seen
I wish I knew exactly what I mean
It starts out like an "A" word as anyone can see
But somewhere in the middle it gets awful "QR" to me
If I ever find out just what this word can mean
I'll be the smartest bird the world has ever seen!

It might be kind of an elephant
Or a funny kind of kazoo
Or strange, exotic turtle
You never see in a zoo
Or maybe a kind of a doggie
Or particular shade of blue
Or maybe a pretty flower
Naah, not with a name like that, Uh uh!

It's the most remarkable word I've ever seen
I wish I knew exactly what I mean
It starts out like an "A" word as anyone can see
But somewhere in the middle it gets awful "QR" to me
If I ever find out just what this word can mean
I'll be the smartest bird the world has ever seen!

* this dude also wrote the theme to three's company!
2:35 PM | link | (4) comments

lazy and good for nothing

have i posted the lyrics to this song before? i'm disinclined to actually look...

alphabet - jeff lewis

Late at night cloudy light will creep over my old house
And the chair, where I once sat, someone new is there, and he'll stare at that wall, and we're all
Parts of an alphabet
Spell new words in new spots we're at

And the big blue boat drifts around in the dark
When you feel like a jerk does it make you confused?
Like how could you become as awesome as you are and still feel like a loser?
When you feel ugly and petty
Awkward and unsteady
Just try not to forget there's so many people who've liked you
I hope that the art school enjoys your big drawing of ruins
We've all got good things to do and it's good when we do them

From Austin to Brooklyn
They're all smart and good lookin'
We're all parts of an alphabet
Spell new words with new folks we met

And the big blue boat drifts around in the dark
And the big blue boat drifts around in the dark
And they say that we'll drift for a while till we die and the sun it's a spiral it's a combination lock
And I'm just hoping that I'll get it all in and that these joys and frustrations are just turns in the combination
2:24 PM | link | (2) comments

Wednesday, July 20, 2005

if organization is plastic, then i am anti-plastic


could you do me a favor? i seem to have spaced on every obligation that i have between now and careyoke's wedding (which i believe is on the second of september). if i have made a commitment to you or if there is a big day that i should remember, could you please remind me? for example, i can't quite remember when jeff and stamie are moving. and when is the going away party for jeremy/katy/sarah? and abby's wedding? and when are people coming into town? and when are they leaving? and the next karaoke?

i'm sorry i'm a flake. there is this prelim thing in less than 2 weeks.
11:36 AM | link | (3) comments

Monday, July 18, 2005

secret housemate

i may have a secret roommate. i say this because i cannot find my spare key. did i give it to any of you, or is someone else living with me, waiting until i go out to come in?

could you at least check your pockets?
9:34 PM | link | (3) comments

rock fricking on!

i finally got a freaking job! 50% appointment. in psych. i'm gonna have to brush up on my stats, but i'm looking forward to that, too. i just have to teach a little bit of a review of ANOVA and whatnot. and they use SPSS, so i don't even have to relearn Stata.

the best part of all is that i will just have 18 students. 18. that's it. the awesomest thing i have ever heard.
8:41 PM | link | (4) comments

Thursday, July 14, 2005


when we were kids, my sister and i really loved the segement on sesame street about a little girl who took her llama to the dentist. i am going to the dentist today, and i can't get the song out of my head, but this makes me happy.

Me And My llama
Me and my llama
Goin' to the dentist today
Seems a little crazy
Guess you're just too lazy
You gotta get your teeth cleaned today

Me and my llama
Jumped out of our pajamas
And ran off to the dentist today
Me and my llama
Me and my llama
We're goin 'to the dentist ooo-eee
Yes, it's just my llama and me

Tell me if you feel afraid
Remember just to whisper softly into my ear
I won't leave and go away
You know I'm gonna be right here
Open up wide now
Let him look inside now
'Cause after this we'll go on our way
I won't let him hurt you
I'll be right there beside you
And I can tell that you'll be okay

Me and my llama
Jumped out of our pajamas
And ran off to the dentist today

Me and my llama
Me and my llama
We're goin' to the dentist oooo-eee
Yes, it's just my llama and me

'Cause after this we'll go on out and play...

Me and my llama
Me and my llama
The sun is bright and now we are free
Yes, it's just my llama and me
11:22 AM | link | (3) comments

a bazillion is the loneliest number

angela and jeremy (who i am too lazy to link right now) have both reccently had melancholy blog posts. unrelated to this, i sent them both a sweet email about how much fun i had eating dinner with them last night. they actually had me laughing so hard that people were staring at me. separately i sent them both nice emails about how i think they are good people. i also sent jon an email about how he is a good person. i am happy and full of affection for me friends today...

... and i am getting NO RESPONSES from them!

but, i think i will try to remain happy and pleased with my friends.

belle, lisa, careyoke, hazel - i love you all, too. and henry. and my family. and carole and joe. and everybody else, too.

did i mention that "the meds lady" gave me more meds?
11:13 AM | link | (4) comments

Wednesday, July 13, 2005


jon has not told me whether or not he will cut my hair. i am beginning to think that he does not read my blog.
5:47 PM | link | (3) comments

Tuesday, July 12, 2005

i am never one to look a gift horse in the mouth

i might, however, look a gift horse in the back of the head. if i did, i would discover that the haircut my mother purchased for me is sub par. this should have been easy to predict. here were 3 warning signs:

1. the woman cutting my hair did not have a very good haircut - though it was better than the hair of the woman who cut my mother's hair.
2. the place offers very, very cheap haircuts.
3. it was just under 30 minutes to close.

jon, you reccently got an inadequate haircut which i touched up, would you be willing to do the same for me? it might require a bit of skill. perhaps you could hold the scissors perpendicular to the ground rather than parallel. that might help fix the "blending" that the woman said she had done. my hair looks about as blended as a terraced farm in nepal.

stolen from someone's vacation photos of nepal
2:21 PM | link | (0) comments

girl without baggage seeks same

actually, i seek my baggage. i just got back from my friend henry's wedding in texas, but my belongings decided to go to pittsburgh. well, maybe they decided to go to pittsburgh. the airline still hasn't located my bag. well, yesterday they claim to have found my bag, and they told me that i would get it last night or this morning, but now they don't know where it is. actually, the recording doesn't know where it is. nor does the automated email response. but a real, live human being told me that it would be in madison by 8:50 last night.

i'm confused.

all of my clean clothes were in my bag. if i am to wear anything tomorrow, i will have to do laundry today. i hate laundry.

UPDATE: i couldn't take it anymore. i finally figured out how to talk to a human being (easier than i thought it would be) and i spoke to someone in the world's loudest call center. how one can think with hundreds of phone conversations going on around is beyond me. anyway, my bag is expected in chicago today by 5:30. i don't know when that means it will get to me. hopefully it doesn't have to ride the van galder like i did. if it does, i hope it isn't similarly seated next to a man who insists on using his laptop even though that means he jabs his neighbor in the side with his elbow every time he types.
12:54 PM | link | (2) comments

Monday, July 04, 2005

like tegan and sara, i am so jealous

i'm sitting in my sister's living room using her new laptop to check email, post, etc. it is a glowing white iBook and the keys make a satisfying click when i type. jon's got a new lappy, too. i want one! i've been borrowing a computer from jeremy for the last few months, but i'd really like something of my own and something that is a bit more portable than his old laptop.

why can't i be a kept woman? i bet i could even get an iPod out of a deal like that.
8:33 PM | link | (10) comments

Friday, July 01, 2005

i know you're not trying to hurt me, what is effort?

why do i listen to sad music when i am sad? stupid, stupid, stupid dorotha! i almost sad down and cried three times on my walk to school this morning.

i am such an idiot. maybe jeremy's friend could get me this book.
10:04 AM | link | (6) comments