the wrong side of the bed
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
i have a swiss army knife that used to belong to my dad
we are having a suprise family get together this weekend in new orleans. my dad is turning 60 on the 9th. many of us will be arriving in new orleans after my dad. i suggested that we all wear masks of his face and that he should have to guess who is under the mask. only my mom thought this was funny. what do you think?
Saturday, August 26, 2006
i wonder, wonder, wonder who wrote the young adult book of love?
Thursday, August 24, 2006
a place for everything
tony roma's is a place for ribs,* not a place for vegetarians. yesterday, we had a huge, day long event at work, and, just to get out of the office for a bit, ten of us went out to lunch. the place they chose was tony roma's. i said before hand, "remember that i am vegeterian, will there be anything for vegetarians?" of course not, but they all said, "oh, yes. i'm sure there will be. maybe a salad or some pasta." i had a sad little baked potato and a side salad. i hate baked potatos.
i won't be going to lunch with the gang again.
i'm such an outsider at work. i don't want a baby. i don't want to get married. i don't eat meat. even the lesbians at work do these things. at this point, i'd kill for a wiccan co-worker.
* this was their ad campaign when i was a kid.
Monday, August 21, 2006
anyway, people have said that i seem to be doing better. some people attribute this to leaving grad school. some seem to think it is getting this job. my theory is that i am down from about 20 seizures a month to one. yep. one seizure. you have no idea how much beter i feel.
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
get on to the bus that's gonna make you stop going rub a dub
yesterday i learned that, if you are lucky, when your bus breaks down and gets trapped at the south transfer point before it comes to pick you up, there just might be a woman from madison metro driving around (by fluke) who will take to your connecting bus, thus preventing you from totally freaking out when no bus shows up. but i also learned that just because someone from madison metro scares the socks off of you by telling you that they are doing away with the only route that will take you to your work place doesn't mean that they won't replace it with another. whew!
* "robber" sounds so corny. i thought about using "perp" like they do on crime dramas, but that seemed incredibly stupid. what do you call the people who hold you up?
Monday, August 14, 2006
i'm scared. i'm scared. i'm scared.
Saturday, August 12, 2006
everything is coming up millhouse!
anyway, i'm going to need some help getting around. the job requires a little bit of driving and right now i can't. if you are in madison, and if you are interested in making a bit of pocket cash, i'm looking for people to drive me around. i don't care if you are a teenager. i trust you. in fact, if you just know someone who might be able to drive me around a bit, let me know. i can't pay a lot, but i will pay you. and i won't make you wear one of those silly driver's hats.
send me an email, would you? you know, if you can help?
Friday, August 11, 2006
my brother and i wonder
is anyone willing to try? i'm not flying any time soon. plus, they are mega gross and not available this time of year. if you have some laying around, let me know.
Wednesday, August 09, 2006
dorotha's not an asset to the abbey
but , i lost it when i finally got home at 8:30. i am responsible for taking out the trash for three houses on my block. i find this job incredibly irritating. people do the grossest shit with their trash and recycling. you know, like dumping kitty litter in without a bag... in the recycling bin! the thing that bugs me the most, though, is that there is a broken trash can behind my apartment. it has no wheels, but it is supposed to. it can't balance. it falls over. i haven't figured out how to throw the trash can away. i'm just not sure how. do i put it in another trash can? what torments me about this trash can is that someone, or more than one someone, insists on using this trash can despite the two other empty trash cans. why? why?!?!?!
today was a terrible day. so terrible i had to use (my mother's) teacher voice on a four year old. so terrible that i waited three hours for someone to show up late just to have them get mad at me. but it wasn't until i was taking out the trash that i was driven to yell. standing alone in the mud behind my house, i shouted, "do you have eyes!?!? can you even see?!?!"
and then, i immediately felt guilty. what if i have a neighbor who can't see? a neighbor who has no eyes? what if they are putting trash in the broken can? and yet, this is impossible. because whoever uses this trash can sets it upright to put the trash in. sets it upright and then leans it against something, like an empty trash can.
what do i do, mom? what do i do?
Tuesday, August 08, 2006
today on the bus, i saw a middle aged man wearing acid washed jeans. true story!
kid: do you have any acid?
jon: sorry, man, i don't have any aspirin.
kid: do you want any acid?
me (to kid): no, we are fine.
me (to jon): i'll go with you to get the beer!
later jon went outside to smoke a cigarette. when he came back in, he said that someone else had tried to sell him acid. he said, "i didn't know it was that kind of show!"
* when jon said that he was in material science, the kid said, "i don't know what that is and i know a little bit about everything!"
Saturday, August 05, 2006
i hear the secrets that you keep
* if i am so dang tired, why am i up now? it is because i woke up needing to use the restroom, and then i had to floss. i have developed this weird nighttime flossing habit. i can't sleep as well as i used to, so if i wake up, and i inevitably do, i floss. i have never been a diligent flosser, so i am hoping to receive praise from my hygenist when i go in to the dentist on the 15th. i really want to get some minty flavored floss. the wide, ribbon kind.
Friday, August 04, 2006
* only my brother and sister will recognize this reference, and they don't read my blog. eh, the rest of you can just wonder. or you can go back to not caring what i write on my blog. no biggie. i'm just going to sit here, relishing my cleanliness, no matter what you do!
Thursday, August 03, 2006
this is how i feel today
“So I guess I’ll see you around?”
“I’ll see you when I see you.”
Please don’t laugh at my broken heart
It’s bad enough that my car won’t start
There’s nothing worse than being lovesick
when your broken down car, a real piece of shit
You broke my heart, my car won’t start
You smile at me as is if you cared
With the smell of your goodbye, hands in my hair
Why did you wait till a quarter till one
When there are no buses running, not even one
You broke my heart, my car won’t start
You broke my heart, my car won’t start
i don't think these are exactly the right lyrics, but they are close. whatever.
anyway, jon and i didn't break up or anything, if you were worried. this is just how i feel today.
Wednesday, August 02, 2006
three things that are making this day totally shape up to be awesomely awesome
1. this morning i opened my door to find a priority mail package from my friend carole! she sent me a letter, a playmobil devil*, some bookmarks, some postcards, a check for $20**, a comic book from free comic book day, and a rockin' poster of cyndi lauper! yay for carole!!
2. when i tried to walk out my front door, there was wet cement! this is awesome because "they" dug up my front walk well over two weeks ago. it was getting pretty old to either walk in a giant U to get to the back door or to trudge through dirt and mud to get to the front door. what a relief!
3. i'm doing laundry, which i hate. a load in the wash used to cost $1, but then we got a new washing machine, and laundry went up to $1.25. today it suddenly costs 75 cents!
* jon gave me this same devil on thursday. am i sad that i have two? hell no! devils are awesome!
** i don't know if carole really owes me $20, as she claims, but i am cashing the check anyway.
also, does this video work? does it make people want to go to ASU?