the wrong side of the bed

Thursday, March 30, 2006

now that i have epilepsy, will i lose my faithful readers?

it seems that there are those out there who may reject me because i have epilepsy. are you among them? please say no...

from the epilepsy foundation: "Close relationships usually pose another question: At what point do I explain that I have epilepsy? There's no right answer for everybody, of course, but in general, disclosing the fact of having epilepsy seems to create the least difficulty when it happens after people have had a chance to get to know each other, rather than on the first date."

from epilepsy.com: "There is no reason to rush the disclosure of epilepsy. Unless the seizures are so frequent that one might occur on the first date, it is best to wait until the ice is broken and trust and openness have developed in the relationship. These positive developments may happen on the first date or the tenth date, or they may never happen. If the two persons are obviously incompatible, there is no reason to discuss the disorder. If the relationship is developing slowly but is promising, it is reasonable to discuss the epilepsy earlier rather than later. It is best to tell the other person face to face, not over the telephone or by letter."

an abstract from an article on the neurology india site: "Women in India are greatly discriminated against if they happen to have epilepsy. Engagements are often cancelled. The parents of epileptic girls have to give heavy dowry at the time of marriage, even if the boy is handicapped. As a result, many girls do not disclose their problem before marriage. They take the medicine secretly. Epilepsy may sometimes produce problems during pregnancy and delivery, otherwise epileptic women on anti epileptic drugs, can lead a normal married, professional and social life. The stigma of epilepsy should be done away with, as we enter the 21st century."
11:07 AM

13 Comments:

i for one am seeking my blogging entertainment where a non-epilectic is at the helm, madam!
Blogger Henry, at 11:40 AM  
Well, luckily, you did not disclose this to me on our first date. Thus, I feel we have enough of an established relationship that I can deal with your horrible, limiting disability, despite the obvious burdens it will put upon me.
Blogger Gwen, at 12:41 PM  
Dorotha came into my office this morning to tell me how similar having epilepsy is to being Jewish. Yes, I mean, when do you tell someone you're Jewish? Certainly not over the phone or by letter.
Blogger Belle Reve, at 2:36 PM  
My rejecting your blog has nothing to do with epilepsy.

It's your haircut.
Blogger brady, at 9:22 PM  
Have you told your students yet?
Anonymous Anonymous, at 9:42 PM  
if I were to reject your blog, it would be because you hit me all the time.

But it ends up that I don't mind that so much, so whatever.
Blogger the jeff, at 10:07 PM  
You've been open with your readers about the epilepsy, but not about who is credited with figuring out you have epilepsy.
Blogger jeremy, at 12:05 AM  
anon: i mentioned it to them before i went to the doctor for the diagnosis. i am going to talk about it today in class, actually. we are talking about the Defense of Marriage Act. until 1980, there were still states in the US that prohibited people with epilepsy from getting married. i think it will be an interesting thing to add to the discussion.

brady: at least i'm not a scruffy little pup like you!

jeremy: you are tremendously annoying. for other readers, jeremy keeps taking credit for my decision to go to the doctor. really, my sister is the biggest reason i went. jeremy definitely contributed to my decision to got to the doctor, but, if i recall, jeremy, you did not order the MRI or interpret the resulting images to make the diagnosis.
Blogger dorotha, at 6:58 AM  
but i did! why no shout-out?
Blogger Henry, at 7:13 AM  
Jeremy may have told Dorotha to go to the doctor, but I'd like to remind everyone that when my foot hurt last year, he told me that he didn't think the doctor could do anything and I should just walk it off. As it turned out, I had a potentially fatal blood clot. :p
Blogger Rhymes With Scrabble, at 12:47 PM  
LOL RWS, LOL!
nyah-nyah -- JF likes Dorotha more than you!

Lol, that phrase "walk it off" just slays me as it brings to mind various h.s. sports coaches. Very funny
Anonymous Anonymous, at 6:36 PM  
Yo Dorotha, tough news about the epilepsy. If it makes you feel any better I only stopped reading your blog for a few weeks to punish you for having it, not forever.

Also, check out this website (www.crazymeds.org)--I fucking love it. Its written by some guy with epilepsy/bipolar. I found it doing a search on Zoloft and side effects (Zoloft, she is zee love of my life, but alzo a cruel miztress sometimes....no fatal skin infection risk though, just fatigue)
Blogger astrid jane, at 12:44 AM  
I did what everyone else in a small town does--I told people, if for no other reason than the fact that everyone would find out anyway. I now live in a totally different area-alone-with my 3 kids, even my mother had the nerve to ask if i was "expanding the truth". Yeah mom I conned three drs into signing the papers required to get employment sick leave and prescriptions for three different drugs. I literally have one friend left from there and there are even people that won't allow their kids to write to mine after being friends from birth because of my epilepsy.Its almost easier to become a hermit and not tell any one
Anonymous Angelag, at 3:38 AM  

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